"I've not seen so much sweat in one advert before."

Now, I've seen some things that are pretty wrong in my life, and this isn't the worst of them. But I feel it deserves a special mention.
 http://www.vulva-original.com/gb/
 Let me say first, this is not a safe website if you suffer from nearby parents syndrome. A very dodgy video followed by nudity. So let me tell you about it if you dont want to risk it. Of course, if you're Phil Cresswell then dont listen. Have a wank.
Oh, and let it be said that I was shown this by a friend. I didn't search this out myself. Just thought I'd clear that up. Not that anyone will believe me, but hey ho.

At a glance, it's a scent for men, not designed to attract women though, simply for men to enjoy. Already, something is vaguely wrong. Let me explain...

You eagle eyed readers may have already been thrown off by the name of the fragrance. Yes, a vulva is a term for the vagina. What this is effectively, is bottled scent of a vagina, designed for single men to excite themselves with while playing World of Warcraft, I assume.
In all honesty, I can see some men in the world thinking this is the best thing since... well, women. But that isn't what the video on the website implies. Oh no. Let me walk you through it.

The video starts in a noir style, with who appears to be Sawyer from Lost (I had to google that), soon joined by a scantily clad Sarah Jessica Parker (except less horse like). He starts checking her out, like you do, and the camera follows her as she wanders over to the excercise bike in the middle of the room, which is now confirmed to be the most under furnished gym in the world. She begins to excercise, as he watches. The camera focuses on her crotch area as it moves up and down on the seat, and droplets of sweat are visible on the seat. This continues, juxtaposed by shots of Sawyer looking at her like a dog staring at an enormous pork sausage smothering itself in Bakers Original. I've not seen so much sweat in one advert before.
Eventually, she leaves the room after her probably un-needed work out. This leaves the man, a sweat covered bike seat, and... no just that. I know what you're thinking, and yes, he actually does it. He goes over, and inhales deeply from the seat. I've never been so moderately repulsed by a video before.

So contrary to what the first impressions were, this is not a mens fragrance apparently. It is not the smell of a vagina designed to keep men quiet. According to this video, it is for men who like the smell of vaginal sweat fluid. I never like saying vaginal, but there i just said it twice. See what I do for you people?
Some people have actually gone and bottled the smell of a sweaty vagina, and bottled it up and made it commercially available. What kind of twisted human would ever, ever, ever, ever, EVER (ever) WANT TO SMELL THAT BY THEIR OWN ACCORD?! I say of their own accord like they might smell it by accident. Well you never know, you might be mown down by an all females marathon race. Then you sit up and things get a bit uncomfortable.
And then after all that, it leads you straight to the online shop. SOME people might seem interested by this, but me? I felt more like having a week long shower. Ugh, I felt truly filthy that day.

Anyway yeah, grossness. I shudder to think if they make a womens equivalent. Scrotum original? The bottled scent of a sweaty ballsack? Its the future, people! Apparently.

Shall I say thanks to the friend who showed me this website. No, no I wont. Oh god no. But you can thank me for going there for you. Believe me, you dont want to see it for yourself. Now go into that corner and cry at the clear loss of all that is decent in this world.